Praise for To The Nines
"Evanovich's many fans will be more than happy with their latest serving of Stephanie Plum who just happens to have more laughs, more sizzling sexual tension, and more nonstop zany adventure than anybody else around."-Publishers Weekly (starred review)
"Evanovich and Stephanie are at the top of their form here: laugh-out loud moments jostle with sticky, visceral terror...ever smarter, sexier, scarier."-Booklist (starred review)
"It didn't matter diddly if you haven't read Nos. 1 through 8 of the Plum saga. Start right here, right now. This is the best of the bunch...it's pure Evanovich."-The State (Columbia, SC)
"Evanovich comes up a winner with the funny, fast-paced To the Nines, which has more plot than some of its predecessors...[its]subplots don't detract from the main premise-keeping Stephanie Plum alive, well and more than ready for her next outing. Us too."-Orlando Sentinel
"To the Nines may be the edgiest of the Stephanie Plum books...Evanovich is brilliantly evocative...she has a genius for almost palpably recreating low-rent scenery like [the] description of the Indian man's industrial-park workplace...these miniatures...and the sizzling sex scenes strike such a wonderfully Hitchcock-like implicitness [and] are what make the Stephanie Plum books such a treat for sore eyes."-Denver Post
"The fun is right on target in the 10th Stephanie Plum adventure, To the Nines...Evanovich returns year after year with one of the genre's most recognizable and irresistible heroines, and in this year's addition, shows she has what it takes to stay on top."-Houston Chronicle
"Continues Evanovich's standards for over-the-top situations...an enjoyable read, with many laugh-out-loud situations...the 'apprehension' that begins To the Nines is the kind of lowbrow comedy that Evanovich has made into an art...longtime fans won't be disappointed."
-Las Vegas Review Journal
"Few characters in modern mystery fiction are better loved than Janet Evanovich's...the Stephanie Plum novels are all about characters...and their strange and wonderful interactions. Longtime Evanovich readers cite humor and sense of family among the reasons for reading her books, and I concur wholeheartedly."-Bookpage
"The appeal of Janet Evanovich's popular creation is that she's not much better than the average Jersey girl would be at nabbing criminals...the charms of Evanovich's writing have less to do with intricate plotting than with the characters in Stephanie's working-class neighborhood and her glamour-free job apprehending bail jumpers."-Entertainment Weekly
Hard Eight
"Evanovich does it again, delivering an even more suspenseful and more outrageous turn with the unstoppable Stephanie."-Publishers Weekly (starred review)
"The things Evanovich does so well-family angst, sweet eroticism, stealth shopping, that stunning mix of terror and hilarity-are done better than ever here."-Booklist (starred review)
"Keeps up Evanovich's standards for over-the-top situations" -Chicago Tribune
"[A] must read...readers will want to finish this delightful work in one sitting."--Midwest Book Review
"The girl mercenary is as fresh as ever." -People
"Hard Eight is most emphatically not Raymond Chandler but, like his work, a piece of finely crafted prose." -San Francisco Chronicle
"Plum is one of fiction's most irresistible heroines."-Seattle Post Intelligencer
"Evanovich has certainly come a long way since One for the Money."--Library Journal
"Well plotted and cleverly resolved...her wickedly funny characterizations and the intriguing love triangle are what keep her readers coming back for more."-Bookpage
"As close to summer escapism as you can get. A great addition to a well-stocked beach bag."
-Houston Chronicle
Seven Up
"A madcap comic mystery-Jersey-girl style."-The New York Times
"Expect a laugh per page...Bottom line: Plum Pick."-People
"If you like your summer reads hot and sassy, try SEVEN UP."-Boston Herald
"Evanovich is the crown princess of detective fiction...SEVEN UP is brassy, comical, and light-hearted."-Bookpage
"Edgy romance triangle, the loopy family relationships, or the bounty-hunting jobs that skate between absurdity and genuine tension."-Denver Post
"Romantic and laugh-out-loud funny, this caper is the perfect summer antidote to serious reading."-St. Louis Post-Dispatch
"The dialogue's snappy...the pace is quick...Evanovich's great gift is an ability to create situations zany enough to provoke bursts of laughter."-Philadelphia Inquirer
"Evanovich continues...her successful formula...[she] provides a beginning that illustrates all that is right with this series and an ending that ties the story together, gives us a dose of reality, and leaves us with a cliffhanger."-Chicago Tribune
From the Back Cover
Praise for To The Nines
"Evanovich's many fans will be more than happy with their latest serving of Stephanie Plum who just happens to have more laughs, more sizzling sexual tension, and more nonstop zany adventure than anybody else around."-Publishers Weekly (starred review)
"Evanovich and Stephanie are at the top of their form here: laugh-out loud moments jostle with sticky, visceral terror...ever smarter, sexier, scarier."-Booklist (starred review)
"It didn't matter diddly if you haven't read Nos. 1 through 8 of the Plum saga. Start right here, right now. This is the best of the bunch...it's pure Evanovich."-The State (Columbia, SC)
"Evanovich comes up a winner with the funny, fast-paced To the Nines, which has more plot than some of its predecessors...[its]subplots don't detract from the main premise-keeping Stephanie Plum alive, well and more than ready for her next outing. Us too."-Orlando Sentinel
"To the Nines may be the edgiest of the Stephanie Plum books...Evanovich is brilliantly evocative...she has a genius for almost palpably recreating low-rent scenery like [the] description of the Indian man's industrial-park workplace...these miniatures...and the sizzling sex scenes strike such a wonderfully Hitchcock-like implicitness [and] are what make the Stephanie Plum books such a treat for sore eyes."-Denver Post
"The fun is right on target in the 10th Stephanie Plum adventure, To the Nines...Evanovich returns year after year with one of the genre's most recognizable and irresistible heroines, and in this year's addition, shows she has what it takes to stay on top."-Houston Chronicle
"Continues Evanovich's standards for over-the-top situations...an enjoyable read, with many laugh-out-loud situations...the 'apprehension' that begins To the Nines is the kind of lowbrow comedy that Evanovich has made into an art...longtime fans won't be disappointed."
-Las Vegas Review Journal
"Few characters in modern mystery fiction are better loved than Janet Evanovich's...the Stephanie Plum novels are all about characters...and their strange and wonderful interactions. Longtime Evanovich readers cite humor and sense of family among the reasons for reading her books, and I concur wholeheartedly."-Bookpage
"The appeal of Janet Evanovich's popular creation is that she's not much better than the average Jersey girl would be at nabbing criminals...the charms of Evanovich's writing have less to do with intricate plotting than with the characters in Stephanie's working-class neighborhood and her glamour-free job apprehending bail jumpers."-Entertainment Weekly
Hard Eight
"Evanovich does it again, delivering an even more suspenseful and more outrageous turn with the unstoppable Stephanie."-Publishers Weekly (starred review)
"The things Evanovich does so well-family angst, sweet eroticism, stealth shopping, that stunning mix of terror and hilarity-are done better than ever here."-Booklist (starred review)
"Keeps up Evanovich's standards for over-the-top situations" -Chicago Tribune
"[A] must read...readers will want to finish this delightful work in one sitting."--Midwest Book Review
"The girl mercenary is as fresh as ever." -People
"Hard Eight is most emphatically not Raymond Chandler but, like his work, a piece of finely crafted prose." -San Francisco Chronicle
"Plum is one of fiction's most irresistible heroines."-Seattle Post Intelligencer
"Evanovich has certainly come a long way since One for the Money."--Library Journal
"Well plotted and cleverly resolved...her wickedly funny characterizations and the intriguing love triangle are what keep her readers coming back for more."-Bookpage
"As close to summer escapism as you can get. A great addition to a well-stocked beach bag."
-Houston Chronicle
Seven Up
"A madcap comic mystery-Jersey-girl style."-The New York Times
"Expect a laugh per page...Bottom line: Plum Pick."-People
"If you like your summer reads hot and sassy, try SEVEN UP."-Boston Herald
"Evanovich is the crown princess of detective fiction...SEVEN UP is brassy, comical, and light-hearted."-Bookpage
"Edgy romance triangle, the loopy family relationships, or the bounty-hunting jobs that skate between absurdity and genuine tension."-Denver Post
"Romantic and laugh-out-loud funny, this caper is the perfect summer antidote to serious reading."-St. Louis Post-Dispatch
"The dialogue's snappy...the pace is quick...Evanovich's great gift is an ability to create situations zany enough to provoke bursts of laughter."-Philadelphia Inquirer
"Evanovich continues...her successful formula...[she] provides a beginning that illustrates all that is right with this series and an ending that ties the story together, gives us a dose of reality, and leaves us with a cliffhanger."-Chicago Tribune
About the Author
Janet Evanovich is the author of the Stephanie Plum books, including One for the Money and Sizzling Sixteen, and the Diesel & Tucker series, including Wicked Appetite. Janet studied painting at Douglass College, but that art form never quite fit, and she soon moved on to writing stories. She didn’t have instant success: she collected a big box of rejection letters. As she puts it, “When the box was full I burned the whole damn thing, crammed myself into pantyhose and went to work for a temp agency.” But after a few months of secretarial work, she managed to sell her first novel for $2,000. She immediately quit her job and started working full-time as a writer. After a dozen romance novels, she switched to mystery, and created Stephanie Plum. The rest is history. Janet’s favorite exercise is shopping, and her drug of choice is Cheeze Doodles.
Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
CHAPTER 1, PART 1
My name is Stephanie Plum and I was born and raised in the Chambersburg section of Trenton where men pretty much only drop their drawers in private. Thank God for small favors because the top activities for men in the Burg are scarfing pastries and pork rinds and growing ass hair. The pastry and pork rind scarfing I've seen first hand. The ass hair growing is for the most part rumor.
The first butt I saw up close and personal belonged to Joe Morelli. Morelli put an end to my virgin status and showed me an ass that was masculine perfection ...smooth and muscular and blemish free. Back then Morelli thought a long term commitment was twenty minutes. I was one of thousands who got to admire Morelli's bare ass as he pulled his pants up and headed for the door.
Morelli's been in and out of my life since then. He's currently in and he's improved with age, butt included.
So the sight of a naked ass isn't exactly new to me, but the one I was presently watching took the cake. Punky Balog had an ass like Winnie the Pooh ...big and fat and furry. Sad to say, that was where the similarity ended because, unlike Pooh bear, there was nothing endearing or cuddly about Punky Balog.
I knew about Punky's ass because I was in my new sunshine yellow Ford Escape, sitting across from Punky's dilapidated row house, and Punky had his huge Pooh butt plastered against his second story window. My sometimes partner, Lula, was riding shotgun for me and Lula and I were staring up at the butt in open mouthed horror.
Punky slid his butt side to side on the pane and Lula and I gave a collective, upper lip curled back eeyeuuw!
"Think he knows we're out here," Lula said. "Think maybe he's trying to tell us something."
Lula and I work for my bail bonds agent cousin, Vincent Plum. Vinnie's office is on Hamilton Avenue, his front window looking into the Burg. He's not the world's best bonds agent. And he's not the worst. Truth is, he'd probably be a better bondsman if he wasn't saddled with Lula and me. I do fugitive apprehension for Vinnie and I have a lot more luck than skill. Lula mostly does filing. Lula hasn't got luck or skill. The thing Lula has going for her is the ability to tolerate Vinnie. Lula's a plus size black woman in a size seven white world and Lula's had a lot of practice at pulling attitude.
Punky turned and gave us a wave with his Johnson.
"That's just so sad," Lula said. "What do men think of? If you had a lumpy little wanger like that would you go waving it in public?"
Punky was dancing now, jumping around, wanger flopping, doodles bouncing.
"Holy crap," Lula said. "He's gonna rupture something."
"It's gotta be uncomfortable."
"I'm glad we forgot the binoculars. I wouldn't want to see this up close."
I didn't even want to see it from a distance.
"When I was a 'ho I used to keep myself from getting grossed out by pretending men's privates were Muppets," Lula said. "This guy looks like an anteater Muppet. See the little tuft of hair on the anteater head and then there's the thing the anteater snuffs up ants with... Except ol' Punky here's gotta get real close to the ants on account of his snuffer isn't real big. Punky's got a pinky."
Lula was a 'ho in a previous life. One night while plying her trade she had a near death experience and decided to change everything but her wardrobe. Not even a near death experience could get Lula out of spandex. She was currently wearing a skin tight hot pink mini-skirt and a tiger print top that made her boobs look like big round over-inflated balloons. It was early June and mid-morning and the Jersey air wasn't cooking yet, so Lula had a yellow angora sweater over the tiger top.
"Hold on," Lula said. "I think his snuffer is growing."
This produced another eeyeuuw from us.
"Maybe I should shoot him," Lula said.
"No shooting!" I felt the need to discourage Lula from hauling out her Glock, but truth was, it seemed like it'd be a public service to take a potshot at Punky.
"How bad do we want this guy?" Lula asked.
"If I don't bring him in, I don't get paid. If I don't get paid, I don't have rent money. If I don't have rent money, I get kicked out of my apartment and have to move in with my parents."
"So we want him real bad."
"Real bad."
"And he's wanted for what?"
"Grand theft auto."
"At least it's not armed robbery. I'm gonna be hoping the only weapon he's got, he's holding in his hand right now ...on account of this don't look like much of a threat to me."
"I guess we should go do it."
"I'm ready to rock and roll," Lula said. "I'm ready to kick some Punky butt. I'm ready to do the job."
I turned the key in the ignition. "I'm going to drop you at the corner so you can cut through the back and take the back door. Make sure you have your walkie talkie on so I can let you know when I'm coming in."
"Roger, that."
"And no shooting, no breaking doors down, no Dirty Harry imitations."
"You can count on me."
Three minutes later, Lula reported she was in place. I parked the Escape two houses down, walked to Punky's front door and rang the bell. No one responded so I rang a second time. I gave the door a solid rap with my fist and shouted bond enforcement. Open the door.
I heard shouting carrying over from the back yard, a door crashing open and slamming shut and then more muffled shouting. I called Lula on the talkie but got no response. A moment later the front door opened to the house next to me and Lula stomped out.
"Hey, so excuse me," she yelled at the woman behind her. "So I got the wrong door. It could happen, you know. We're under a lot of pressure when we're making these dangerous apprehensions."
Copyright © 2003 by Evanovich, Inc.
